Kelly: The ever so cliche saying of God making good out of something bad really is true. We were 15 when Brian passed away; still young and clueless. Heck, I'm still young and clueless, but that's beside the point. But after the funeral, I remember feeling a sense of closure, but that sense of closure soon turning into anger. I was angry at God; angry and wondering how He could take someone I had barely known away from me. From the rest of his friends. From his family. It didn't seem fair. A few weeks prior to his death, he went to some camp....sadly I can't remember which one, and he accepted Christ. Again, I don't remember where I heard that from. He was about to start his senior year of high school and was supposed to graduate with our brother.
Then coming to college and things changed. I thought about Brian a lot. But that night I accepted Christ into my life (again) I realized and was comforted at the fact that he was in Heaven with Jesus, and it felt...right. And now, fast forward to 9 years later. I'm working where I love and loving what I do. So often I get patients who are depressed and want to end their own lives, usually because of a loss in their lives. Lost their jobs, going through a divorce/separation, and most often loss of a loved one. I always try to tell them that times are hard, but somehow we find the strength to make it through. My strength came from (and still does) come from God, but way back then I didn't realize that. Or if I did, I was just too busy being pissed off. And now, our lives are going on, and the world is still spinning. I still do think of Brian, but not as often as I used to. But when I do think of him, I think of my other friends, who for whatever reason or rhyme are still in my life but live far away. I don't know when I'll ever see them again, but I pray for their happiness and safety often. I am at peace, because I know Brian is in a better place, and I do hope one day when my time comes I will see him again.
Holly: It's amazing, and a bit staggering, to be honest, at how sometimes things can change so quickly. Like this week, for example. Monday, I woke up to another normal work day; Tuesday, I had my Grow Appalachia interview; Wednesday, another work day; Thursday, I received the offer; and yesterday, I submitted my resignation to my supervisor. That's that. It's done, just like that. On paper, my last day at UK is August 15th, just shy of three weeks from now. My days at UK are numbered, I have some time in between, and then on August 25th I hop on a plane to either Philadelphia, DC, Columbus, or Atlanta, and start a new chapter in my life. Things change.
And then, yesterday, I thought a lot of Brian. I still remember that day very fondly; just another day of marching band practice. We were all in the auditorium and then my friend was running to Kelly and I saying "it's Brian, he's gone." Things change.
Yesterday, July 25th, was 9 years since we lost our friend Brian, killed in a car accident. Brian was a friend whom we had just barely gotten to know, and yet...I don't know if I can speak for everyone, but I felt as if I'd known him my whole life. He could make anybody laugh. When we all parted ways for the summer I almost couldn't wait for the new school year to start, just to see what sort of shenanigans our group could get into. Our group all saw each other again that summer, but it was at his funeral. Not long after that, school started again. That was 9 years ago. I was 15 years old, still a kid, still had so much of high school left, hadn't even heard of Berea College, thought that friendships lasted forever, thought band was my world, and you know...the list goes on. I've done a lot of growing up since then, but I still think of Brian often. Things change, yes they do. But never forget where you were and what has happened.
We all change, when you think about it. We are all different people, all through our lives, and that's ok! That's good! You've got to keep moving, so long as you remember all the people you used to be.
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