You jump. How high?

Kelly: This has been a topic of conversation between us for quite some time now. We all know that one person who always seems to be out and about doing things with friends. And we have heard multiple times the "I'm tired and don't want to go out tonight" line. Yet later on in the night a text or phone call comes in, then it's the "Well I'm off. See you later tonight" line. And then, there's the "well my friends are having this party. You can come if you want to but there's going to be things there that you probably won't be interested in." When I was in Scotland I had one roommate actually tell me "I know you're going to say no but I wanted to ask..." Uh...thanks? Hands up, who's heard any or all of the above statements?

I don't know, maybe I'm just a stick. I consider myself to be somewhat of a social person, but sometimes I tend to lean on the introverted side. I like hanging out with my friends just as much as the average young adult, but I also like having my me time. I'm a BIG fan of quiet nights in, especially after a few rough nights of work. But the way I see it is this; the social world is constantly evolving and frankly, it's not going anywhere anytime soon. And it's not that I do anything "fun" at all, but my type of fun usually means staying in, watching a movie or reading a book (something I did not have the pleasure of doing while in school. One of the MANY benefits of only working part time). Maybe people think they're a bad friend if they turn down an invitation; I used to think that way with my best friend at home. But sometimes, I feel it's really necessary to just say no. It really is ok.

Holly: Personally, I think if you want to have a quiet night in, then you should have a quiet night in.  If your friends invite you somewhere and you say no, and they get upset, then that's their problem.  Don't get me wrong; I love my friends to death, but more often than not I am much more inclined to spend the night to myself reading, watching Big Bang Theory, etc.  Why do we sometimes feel the need to drop everything and do something even though deep down, we REALLY don't want to?  I'm guilty of that, big time.  I sometimes have a hard time saying no.  Mostly because I'm just trying to help out.  But I think you should "go out" or help out when YOU want to because you want to, not because you feel like you have to.  It really is ok to say no sometimes.  I know many of you are just go go go all the time (myself included).  I don't think anyone is going to fault you for wanting to take some time to yourself, heaven forbid.

Heck, even Jesus took time for himself.  There are numerous instances in the Bible when he would go off by himself just to be by himself and pray.  We NEED alone time.  Seriously.  I think if us single (and not!) young adults learn to be independent, we can thrive in our day-to-day relationships with others.  Or we can just learn how to breathe!!! 

I'm rambling.  My apologies.  Take some time for yourself this weekend, even if it's just a few minutes.  And if we do jump at opportunities, let's try to ask ourselves why.