Dear... (Some Sunday Funday humor)

Was doing some old Facebook post perusing and we came across this fun thing from a few years back...we figured we would share it with you all. Because everyone needs a laugh! (Oh, and the template is pasted below so you can create your own) :)

H: Dear Kelly,

I don't really know how to tell you this but I'm joining the convent. I think I realized it when I tripped on peanut butter outside of your office and I saw you sit on my boyfriend. I'm sure you're shamed enough to understand how awful you are. I'm returning your toe ring to you but I'll keep the results of that blood sample as a memory. You should also know that I am better off without you and the apartment building is on fire. 
Greetings to your frog Leonard,
Holly

K: Dear Holly,

I don't really know how to tell you this but our romance is over. I think I realized it when I tripped on peanut butter in a clown suit and I saw you sit on my father. I'm sure you're shamed enough to understand how awful you are. I'm returning your Hannah Montana underwear to you but I'll keep the results of that blood sample as a memory. You should also know that I am better off without you and you should stop picking your nose.
Go drown yourself,
Kelly

*****

Dear (someone you recently talked to),
I don't really know how to tell you this but (1). I think I realized it when (2) (3) and I saw you (4) (5). I'm sure you're (6) to understand (7). I'm returning (8) to you but I'll keep (9) as a memory. You should also know that I (10) and (11). 
(12),
(Your name)

1. What is the color of your shirt?
Blue - I'm in love with your cat
Red - Our affair is over
White - I’m joining the Convent
Black -Our romance is over
Green- Our socks don't match
Grey - You're a leprechaun
Yellow - I'm selling myself for candy
Pink - Your nostrils are insulting
Brown - The mafia wants you
No shirt - Purple hedgehogs want to destroy you
Other -I dislike your eyelashes

2) Which is your birth month?
January - That night you picked your nose
February -When I quoted Forest Gump
March - When your dwarf bit me
April - When I tripped on peanut butter
May - When I finally changed my underwear
June - When you put cuffs on me
July – When I saw the purple monkey
August - When you smacked my ass
September - Last year when you peed your pants
October - When we skinny dipped in the bathtub
November - When your dog humped my leg
December - When I threw up in your sock drawer

3) Which food do you prefer?
Tacos - In your apartment
Chicken- In your car
Pasta - Outside of your office
Hamburgers - Under the bus
Salad – As you were eating Kraft Dinner
Lasagna - In your closet
Kebab - With Jean Chrétien
Seafood - In a clown suit
Sandwiches - At the Elton John concert
Pizza - At the mental hospital
Hot dog - Under a street light
Other- With George Bush and Stephen Harper

4) What's the color of your socks?
Yellow - Ignore
Red - Put whipped cream on
Black - Hit on
Blue - Knock out
Purple - Pour syrup on
White - Carve your initials into
Grey - Pull the clothes off
Brown - bite off
Orange - Castrate
Pink - Pull the pants off of
Barefoot - Sit on
Other - Drive over

5) What's the color of your underwear?
Black - My boyfriend
White - My father
Grey – The Catholic Priest
Brown – The Montreal Canadian’s goalie
Purple - My corned beef hash
Red – My knee caps
Blue - My salt-beef bucket
Yellow - My illegitimate child in Ghana
Orange - My Blink 182 cd
Pink – Your ‘My Little Pony’ collection
Other --The elephant in the corner

6) What do you prefer to watch on TV?
One Tree Hill - Senile
Heroes- Frostbitten
Lost - High
Simpsons- Cowardly
The news - Scarred
American Idol - Masochistic
Family Guy - Open
Top Model - Middle-class
Other -shamed

7) Your mood right now?
Happy - How awful you are
Sad - How boring you are
Bored - That I get turned on only by garbage men
Angry - That your smell makes me vomit
Depressed – That we’re related
Excited - That I may pee my pants
Nervous - The middle-east is planning their revenge on you
Worried - That your Ford sucks
Apathetic - That you need a sex-change
Silly - That I'm allergic to your earlobes
Cuddly - That Santa doesn't exist
Ashamed - That there is no solution to you being a dumb kid
Other - That your driving sucks

8) What's the color of your walls in your bedroom?
White - Your toe ring
Yellow - Your love letters to me
Red - The pictures from Vegas
Black - Your pet rock
Blue - The couch cushions
Green - Your car
Orange - Your false teeth
Brown - Your nose hair clippers
Grey - Our matching snoopy underwear
Purple - Your old New Kids on the Block blanket
Pink - The cut toenails
Other - Your Hannah Montana underwear

9) The first letter of your first name?
A/B - My virginity
C/D - Your photo with the mustache drawn on it
E/F - Your neighbors dog
G/H - The oil tank from your car
I/J - Your left ear
K/L - Your mom
M/N - Your glass eye
O/P - My common sense
Q/R - The results of that blood-sample
S/T - Your collection of butterflies
U/V - Your criminal record
W/X – Your sucide note
Y/Z - Your credit cards

10) The last letter in your last name?
A/B - Love your sweet, sweet ass
C/D - Always will remember the pep talks
E/F -Never will forget that night
G/H – Will not tell the authorites that you stole the whale from the backyard.
I/J – Mocked you behind your back constantly
K/L - Hate your cooking
M/N -Get sick when I think of your feet
O/P - Told my psychiatrist about the bruises
Q/R - Told in my confession today about the moose poaching
S/T - Always wanted to break your legs
U/V - Will try to forget that you broke my heart
W/X - Haven’t showered in a month
Y/Z – am better off without you

11) What do you prefer to drink?
Wine- Our friendship is ruined
Soft drink – I’m off to lead a new life as a lemon
Soda – I will haunt you when I’m reincarnated as an Eskimo
Milk - The apartment building is on fire
Water – I'm scratching my butt as you read this
Cider– I have a passionate interest for mice
Juice – You ruined my attempts at another world war.
Snapple/Vitamin water – You should get that embarrassing rash checked out
Hot chocolate – Your Cucumber-fetishism is weird
Whiskey - I love Oprah Winfrey
Beer – Thanks for the Cocaine
Other – you should stop picking your nose

12) To which country would you prefer to go on a vacation?
Thailand – Warm tingly sensations
Australia - Greetings to your frog Leonard
France - Love always
Spain - With tears of sadness
China – You make me sick
Germany – Please don’t hurt me
Austria- Best of luck on the sex change
Japan - Go milk a cow
Greece - Your everlasting enemy
USA - Sincerely
Egypt – Kiss my butt
England - go drown youself 

Things we learned in March

Holly and Kelly: March was a busy and somewhat slow month for us. Here's what we learned.

Sometimes, you have to say no: even if it's to an old friend who wants to re open the lines of communication. We had to say no; it wasn't even an option. It wasn't worth the risk of possibly things being ok for a while, then back to the same old stuff. You get to a point in your life where you are free to make those decisions, and we lived with the consequences of said choice for too long. We are both at points in our lives where we made peace with the situation and have moved on. Neither of us have heard from this friend since, which says to us our point exactly.

Priorities change: We've put our relationship with each other on the back burners, and are now going to be taking the time to spend time with each other in prayer and devotionals. Over the last few weeks we have done this, it has been astounding to hear about what God is doing in each of our lives. It's been extremely beneficial to the both of us!

Time away is essential: Even if it's just for a few days. The time we were able to spend in Florida was....amazing. Seeing the sunrise on the beach...it was just one of those moments that make you realize how much of a masterpiece artist God is. Neither one of us thought about obligations we had at home, whether at work, things to do in the house, whatever. Take some time to just get out of work for a while; you will be amazed at how much better you feel. 

 God is working: In Kentucky, people! Over the past few months, but more regularly this month, we've been visiting another church with Holly's bf and some friends of ours. We're NOT leaving our current church anytime soon, but it's been super amazing to see the body of Christ working elsewhere in Madison county. He's doing some great things in His body, people, and it has been a privilege to see that work come to life. Also, we had the opportunity to sing with a church from London in a combined service for Easter. It was a long day, but full of blessings to celebrate our risen Lord. (There's a link at the bottom of the page for your viewing pleasure. Buckle up though...it's an hour and ten minutes long...)

Basketball....nah: We suck at basketball. Really, REALLY, suck. There's a reason God called us to work at Grow Appalachia and to be a nurse and to NOT be professional basketball players. Thank God! 


Easter program
Basketball part 1
Basketball part 2 (Kelly's shame)

It all goes to the bad...

Kelly: Have you ever noticed that when someone acts up, throws a fit, gets angry and starts swinging some fists, or when someone talks just to "make a scene," that everyone LOSES THEIR MINDS? Now what do I mean by LOSING THEIR MINDS? They validate it, affirm it, and a slew of "right on's!" and "yeah!" and "you tell them!" are certain to follow. Especially where I work; negative and crappy attitudes just feed one right into the other. One bad and crappy attitude can run the show, and everyone just eats it up. Or when something happens that makes you angry/frustrated, and you dwell on it, and dwell on it, and dwell on it....over, and over, and over. And THEN....on the flip side of that, when like me, I show up, act like my happy-go-lucky self, it arouses suspicion. Like....why are you being so nice? Stop that.

So is that just me? Anyone? 

But sometimes, negativity really REALLY affects me, to the point to where I feel it, deep down in my core and I have to physically remove myself from the person or situation. It's honestly one of the most baffling phenomenons I still to this day experience. I don't get it. Can't wrap my head around it. It just makes me wonder, why do we put so much attention to crappy attitudes or rip roaring rage fests? And admit it....we all do it. It's splattered all over social media day after day after day, demanding our attention. It's human nature, I guess, but still. And I do it too, all the time. God has really been challenging me to focus on the nature of my heart, instead of what's swirling around in my head and the words I say. It hasn't been easy, because sometimes we just want to go with the flow of things, even if it means going with the flow of a toxic environment.

I was talking to my dad last night, and he said he was really inspired by how Holly and I handle things. We were just in Florida not too long ago, and some things happened and we ended up going in the wrong direction on the way to the airport. And I just...rolled with it, even though my nerves were frayed. Eventually, I let it go; I had no control over it. Let me tell you, it makes a difference, and I'm going to level with you all, I just really try to give people the benefit of the doubt. Stuff happens. I get it. We're all wired differently. But the sooner you just let the crap go and focus on things/feelings/stuff that's more worthy of our beck and call, you will be amazed at how....smoothly things just seem to go.

Holly: I'm with my sis on this one. I don't get it either. 

Something Kelly says often, and I'm fairly certain she got it from her work, is "You are responsible for the way that you act, no matter how you feel." I am a generally upbeat person by nature, and I try not to let things get to me. But when I'm exposed to constant negativity, it really does seep into me.  It's toxic! That's the way it was with an old friendship of ours, there towards the end; I'd just get in a funk or in a sour mood afterwards, just because I just had all this negative junk unloaded on me. I never understood, and still don't understand, how you can let one little thing get to you. 

Yes, we are wired differently. I get that, and I try to be mindful of that. But how about instead of reinforcing negative behavior or actions, we reinforce positive behavior or actions? The way I see it is that there's WAY too much negativity in the world as it is. And I'm certainly not saying be a ray of sunshine all the time. I get frustrated and disappointed all the time. But you can try- you can at least try to put a positive spin on things. In fact, I encourage you to try it. I think you'll be surprised.

I want to close with something unrelated, per Kelly's recommendation: I shared something on my Facebook page earlier today and I hope that you are encouraged by it. Because the truth is that God does love us and He does know our deepest desires, and He cherishes us and wants the best for us.

Look to God. He can take it. Choose joy. Be encouraging.

God does answer prayer. I definitely believe that. But sometimes, His answer is "No."
I was dealt the reality of that just this week.

Sometimes we are so convinced that when we receive something, it's from God. And while it very well may be, at least in my own situation, things didn't go as I'd hoped, and at the end of it I was left very broken and hurt. As I did some devotional reading this week, I realized that when God told me "No" in this particular situation, it was because He was preparing me for something better. We don't often see it that way in the moment, because we're in the midst of pain and inner turmoil, but when we are able to look back and recognize that God truly does desire the absolute best for us...it's a relief, almost.

God is good!

H and K (and parents) visit the Sunshine State!

Holly and Kelly: This past weekend sis and I were in Florida for some baseball games and a day at the beach. It was the first time the two of us have seen the ocean since 2009, and let me tell you, when you spend every summer at the beach for as long as you can remember and then go 7 years in between without, it's a long time. We left Friday afternoon and flew out of Louisville into Atlanta then into West Palm Beach where we didn't get to our hotel until after 1 in the morning. Dad picked us up and we all just crashed once we got to the hotel. Saturday morning was spent sipping coffee by the pool, then we gallivanted a few miles up the road to watch the first of two spring training baseball games. Dad's a big Cardinals fan (don't hate) and the tickets came at a really good price, considering it was major league baseball. The weather was absolutely gorgeous too! A bit warm, yes, but there was a time where the clouds got in the way, so we all weren't sitting under the sun for the entire duration of the game. It was nice.  Very nice.

After the first game we ventured off to a small beach and found quite a few shells, and sis and I have a project planned for the shells we did find, so stay tuned for that! We had 3 nights of fantastic food, and I mean fantastic! The best food night was Monday night, where the two of us shared a pasta with mussels, scallops, calamari, shrimp and some kind of fish. We DESTROYED it! I (Kelly) put a pic of it on Facebook, and I'm sure I will gross a few people out. But you want to know what the best thing was? Family time. There's nothing like it. At the second baseball game, Holly was seated next to a family where a younger girl, in her words, was being a brat. She was whining, complaining, glaring at her parents and making rude remarks to her younger sibling. I wish I would have had the chance to tell her to enjoy the moments now, because when she gets to become our age and moves away from her family, you will die for just one more day. Sis and I see our parents on a good year six times, typically it's less than that, usually 4 or 5. We were talking about that one time, how when we were growing up and even in the first few years of college each time we visited we couldn't wait to get back to Berea. But like I said, what I wouldn't have gotten for just one more day at the beach.

Tuesday morning sunrise 

Family selfie! 

Things we learned in February

Holly and Kelly: This was an interesting month for us. A lot of growth occurred, and our lessons were few but simple.

Bigger and "more" isn't always best: I (Kelly) had an opportunity come up to apply for a better paying job (still where I work now), with full time hours and weekends off. The catch was it was working with a patient population I really don't care for. After deliberating and deliberating, I decided not to move forward with applying for it and being ok with where I still am. Because I still am ok where I am.

The start of something new: I (Holly) am still new in my recently not being single, and I have learned so much about myself as a partner and what that may look like in the months/years to come. Who knows? God does. I've also learned a lot about who God is and who I am and it's been a very humbling journey.

Good company is easy to come by: We were at Winter Jam and just had a rocking awesome time. The crowd waiting in line was insanely huge, but there will no ill tempers; just a bunch of Jesus loving folks gathering to hear some praise and worship music.

It's ok to just binge: on TV. Case and point; we have THOROUGHLY enjoyed re-watching House of Cards over the past month or so and some change. It's just fun.

Mom visits are still the best: Even when you're 25 years old.

That's all for now. We're about to get ready for our trip to Florida where baseball and a day of beach will be awaiting us this upcoming weekend!!!!

Identities and labels

Kelly: Who am I? Who are you? First things first, but not necessarily in that order. I identify as a Christian, first off. I'm a nurse, a friend, sister, daughter, among others. I don't have a "someone" in my life, so I don't have any sort of identification as a "girlfriend" or "fiance" or "spouse..." yet.

And I'm ok with that.

It took me a long LONG time to actually accept that right now, it's not for me. A relationship is something that God doesn't want me to pursue right now. I've taken it that He's just not ready to share me yet. And like I said, I'm ok with that. Just because I'm not somebody's girlfriend/fiance/spouse yet doesn't mean the world is going to end tomorrow. I really am ok. My identity as a Christian/single person/nurse/whatever is not something that needs to be fixed, or is something I have any intention of fixing anytime soon. Yes, we have various identities and labels that have been given to us, most of them given to us by choice. But you know? That doesn't mean that we have to carry them around every single moment of every day. And at the end of the day, in the eyes of the Creator, there's only one identity that matters; His child. Because that's the way He sees you! And me. And it's not a one size fits all approach. I've had people tell me "oh, you're a nurse" with THAT kind of tone? Know what I mean? It's almost condescending in a way. Or when I say I'm not married, it sometimes precedes that "oh...." Again, know what I mean? Ok, so the point to all of this is this; we're all not robots. God didn't make us all the same; He did that for a reason! Our identities are sometimes given to us, but it's up to us and to Him to discover more that we may come across.

Holly: I could be completely wrong, and I apologize if I am. But this is just what I've observed, mostly on Facebook, which...ya know.  I'll get to that a little later.

I think there are a lot of people, primarily our age, who simply have no idea how to function as an individual. Seriously. They always have to have someone, a significant other, jumping from one relationship into the next just so they don't have to be alone. Or the stuff I read on Facebook...it's "my boyfriend/husband this" "my girlfriend/wife that".  What about YOU? What about YOU- as a woman, as someone who makes people laugh, a brother, friend, YOU? You. As a person? YOU, the things that make you you?

As a Christian, our identities should first and foremost be found in Christ. But I think, especially with a lot of married people, it's easy to make their spouse an idol. Or their children. Or, if you're not married, maybe an addiction. Or your boyfriend/girlfriend. You get the idea. I believe that when Christ is at the center, He brings out all of our other "hats" naturally, because everything we do ought to be in glory to Him.

As someone who has, rather recently, become unsingle, I'm trying to remain intentional on preserving my individuality. My boyfriend does not complete me, and I don't want to be with him just because he makes me happy or fills me with the warm fuzzies. We made a conscious decision, basically on Day 1, to do our best to keep God at the center of our relationship, and to continue doing the things that make us us. And you know what? It's not hard. Really. Although he does give really good hugs...:) Ok, I sort of feel like I'm rambling and going all over the place, but the point I'm trying to make is that God made you to be uniquely you! Meaning: You don't need anyone or anything except Him! :)

P.S. I made a comment earlier about Facebook...Yes, I am unsingle. No, it's not "Facebook official", and yes, I'm keeping it mostly off social media, because, quite frankly, it drives me crazy to read status after status of how great someone's person is. It's not because I'm too good for social media, it's because I'm focusing on him, telling him what he means to me and not Facebook. The end. kthanxbai.

Things we learned in January

Holly and Kelly: So we stole this idea from a friend of ours. She has her own blog, Reflections in Writing, so you should check it out! Anyway, we have already completed one month in 2016 already (already??!!!) and we wanted to share some things we learned in this month.

Snow: it still stinks, but you have to do what you must. And that opportunity when you FINALLY get to get out of the house is glorious!!!!

God is working BIG: we've been attending church with some friends of ours, and the experience has been very rewarding for us. Though we have no intentions of leaving BBC anytime soon, it's just really awesome to see how God has been working in other parts of KY. The church is all Gods body, no matter where we end up going. 

Friend time is time well spent: even if it means late nights and little sleep. 

Take a chance: even if it's a small one. Kelly reconnected with a good friend after over a year of no contact, and as for Holly? Well, let's just say she's off the market now ;) 

Things we learned in January. What did you learn?