We need each other

H and K: In case you haven't heard, seen, or read lately, the world is going a little bit crazy. Ok...it's straight up lost its mind. We're all holding our breath until November, wondering what dubious schemes or outlandish comments our incumbent presidential candidates will throw out next. We grieve with complete strangers as yet another story breaks the news of a shooting. We think of our Christian brothers and sisters in the Middle East and their constant living in terror and fear of persecution.

The worlds within our own four walls seem to be going crazy too. We pray for our friends who are dealing with death, loss, sickness, hopelessness, uncertainty, We pray for our own family as we deal with aging grandparents and the roller coaster rides that come with that. We pray for each other as we walk through this (hopefully soon ending) season of waiting and anticipation. We recently passed another anniversary of the loss of a dear friend.

Life just seems to be hard right now. We're willing to bet that some of you wonder if God is even really there, if He's even listening at all.

He is.

And for us, He's lightened the heaviness in our hearts by providing us peace when we wouldn't normally have had it. But more than that, He has put some amazingly supportive and kind friends into our lives, many just this year. When we moved to Richmond almost a year ago (whaaat??), for a time we both struggled with loneliness; even though Richmond is only 15 minutes away from Berea, we didn't have any friends close by anymore, and that was hard. It was just within a few months of moving that we re-reconnected (we never really lost touch but life had us all in different directions for a while) with some friends of ours, and now they and their three "kids" have warmed their way back into our hearts and lives again. Some of our fondest memories of 2016 have involved them and we are just so, so thankful, for that and for the future. The story is kind of serendipitous, in a way...it's how Holly met Justin. :)  And then we've made a new friend who lives in Richmond (yay!!!), she's so bubbly and fun-spirited and full of life and Jesus and we just love spending time with her.

And there are others...so, so many others, who have sent us cards for no reason, who have sent us texts just to say they were thinking of us, who have stopped by the house with little "just because" gifts, who have embraced us with so many hugs, prayers, lunch dates, and kind words that sometimes we believe it's so much more than what we deserve.

For me (Holly), I believe that God sometimes manifests Himself through the people He has put in our lives. Think about it: The closeness we feel when we are with those we love. That one word, affirmation, or piece of advice/wisdom from a friend, right when you need it. When your friend or loved one finally reveals that their long-time struggle is over, and you can directly remember praying over that same struggle. Just think about it.

The truth is that we need each other. Plain and simple. The way we interact with those around us...well, it sets an example. It shines the light of Jesus into a world that seems to be plunging deeper into darkness. Being kind or loving those in our lives certainly isn't going to change the world or stop all the violence and nonsense taking place. But it will help make our corner of the world a little brighter. Worry less. Complain less. Compare less. Pray more. Thank more. Practice gratitude more. Encourage more. Love more. Our spirits have been lifted by the company we keep. What can you do to uplift those in your life, even if everything seems to be going fine for them? How can you encourage someone this week?

Dear children, let us not love with words or speech but with actions and in truth. -1 John 3:18

Things we learned in March

Holly and Kelly: March was a busy and somewhat slow month for us. Here's what we learned.

Sometimes, you have to say no: even if it's to an old friend who wants to re open the lines of communication. We had to say no; it wasn't even an option. It wasn't worth the risk of possibly things being ok for a while, then back to the same old stuff. You get to a point in your life where you are free to make those decisions, and we lived with the consequences of said choice for too long. We are both at points in our lives where we made peace with the situation and have moved on. Neither of us have heard from this friend since, which says to us our point exactly.

Priorities change: We've put our relationship with each other on the back burners, and are now going to be taking the time to spend time with each other in prayer and devotionals. Over the last few weeks we have done this, it has been astounding to hear about what God is doing in each of our lives. It's been extremely beneficial to the both of us!

Time away is essential: Even if it's just for a few days. The time we were able to spend in Florida was....amazing. Seeing the sunrise on the beach...it was just one of those moments that make you realize how much of a masterpiece artist God is. Neither one of us thought about obligations we had at home, whether at work, things to do in the house, whatever. Take some time to just get out of work for a while; you will be amazed at how much better you feel. 

 God is working: In Kentucky, people! Over the past few months, but more regularly this month, we've been visiting another church with Holly's bf and some friends of ours. We're NOT leaving our current church anytime soon, but it's been super amazing to see the body of Christ working elsewhere in Madison county. He's doing some great things in His body, people, and it has been a privilege to see that work come to life. Also, we had the opportunity to sing with a church from London in a combined service for Easter. It was a long day, but full of blessings to celebrate our risen Lord. (There's a link at the bottom of the page for your viewing pleasure. Buckle up though...it's an hour and ten minutes long...)

Basketball....nah: We suck at basketball. Really, REALLY, suck. There's a reason God called us to work at Grow Appalachia and to be a nurse and to NOT be professional basketball players. Thank God! 


Easter program
Basketball part 1
Basketball part 2 (Kelly's shame)

For God, in God's place with God's people: A night of worship with Rend Collective and Chris Tomlin

Kelly: Sunday night Holly and I trekked an hour and a half to Newport to partake in a concert night that will be hard to top. I had been awake since 6 that morning and didn't go to bed until almost midnight; I was at work all day prior to the concert, and the latter part of the day was not one of the greatest. I was on edge, with the weight of not only patient safety but staff safety as well as a patient became belligerent, hostile and very threatening. I was very concerned for the safety of the entire unit, and it was very emotionally draining; constantly being on pins and needles and tip toeing around controversial questions, such as what to do and how do we keep everyone safe. I spent half of my required off the clock break in the supervisor's office tackling a game plan. In the end all was well, but some of us were a little more relieved to clock out at the end of that day. And each time I kept trying to leave, I kept getting interrupted, which only added to my frustration, since I was trying to leave at a timely manner to go to the concert. On the way home, I just prayed that even though my thoughts and attitudes had not reflected one of a follower of Jesus, I just prayed that God would tune my heart and mind into one that was wide open and ready for a night of worship.

If someone ever tells you that God answers prayer, believe them. He really does.

For the entire 2 hour concert, most of it didn't even feel like a concert. It felt like being in church. One of the things Chris Tomlin said really just resonated with me for the rest of the night: how great was it to sing about God, in God's house in the presence of God's people? There was so much love, passion and energy in that stadium last night. There's nothing like truly getting lost in the presence of God; where minutes pass by and you don't even realize it because you are just so encapsulated by Him. I had several of those moments there, and I have to be honest, that's something that hasn't happened in a long time. Suddenly, the fears and troubles of the day were just lifted away, and I didn't think about them for the rest of the night. I really listened to the words of those songs that I have known for years, and I felt them, believed them, and felt them. I don't know what's going on in your all's life; I know some things. But I would encourage each and every one of you to take a moment for yourself to just be in God's presence. If that means locking every door and getting into some Scripture, or rolling down every window in your car and singing P&W music at the top of your lungs, or if it just means sitting quietly with nothing around you for a few minutes every morning. It's something I'm going to try and be a bit more intentional about. I'm looking forward to seeing what happens.

Holly: Never mind the fact that we had a three hour round trip and that I had to be at work at 8am on a Monday morning, there was ABSOLUTELY no stopping us in going to this concert. We sort of went on a whim, but if you're a fan of Chris Tomlin and his music, you know that it's going to be an awesome, God-honoring show.  And it was.  It really was.

I have to echo Kelly's comment: it was church, church with 10,000 of my brothers and sisters in Christ, and it was awesome, you guys.  Just awesome. The last time we saw Chris Tomlin was ICHTHUS back in 2006, if my memory serves me correctly, so it'd been a while. Man, he knows how to rock out for God's glory- high energy, passionate, so full of the Spirit that it was contagious! He played all of my favorites, and it was so powerful to hear every single person in the audience sing along too.  Rend Collective was a perfect opening band! They are such a blast! I'm also obsessed with one of the songs they performed, and I think it's threatening to drive Kelly crazy :)

One of the reasons I love Christian concerts is not only the fact that they don't feel like concerts, but you leave feeling so much more encouraged and rejuvenated than before you came. I don't want to say I've been in a  "rut" lately spiritually, but I do feel my quiet time is not necessarily quiet because it's sometimes hard for me to shut my mind off.  I really needed that concert, because I was able to just let go and freely worship, my mind attuned entirely to Him! It reminded me that I can get there, and that I will get there.  I'm working on it, and in the meantime I'm thankful that God doesn't just leave us to our best guesses. I'm thankful that God speaks to us in many ways...for me, especially through music!

Clueless Americans on the half shell

Kelly: I have been back in the states for a little over a week now. I was recently on a mission trip to Peru, and it was incredible! If you want to read more about the trip, please refer to my own separate blog, which you can find the link for in the "where to find us" section on the home page. Ok, that's enough of my shameless plugging. Anyway, since I've been back, I've realized I've harbored a bit of resentment. Resentment towards Americans and our society as a whole. Yesterday, after reading the same junk I read on Facebook day after day, I got sick of it and took a hiatus from it for the rest of the day. In that time, instead of complaining about it, which is what I wanted to do, I prayed and listened to Third Day. And I felt better. The resentment is just geared towards cluelessness in general. We just don't get it. I was at Kroger after a 3 hour work training and a lady was complaining to an employee then to me that a small head of broccoli was being sold by the pound. She then proceeded to tell me, in not so many words, that I was essentially getting ripped off because the particular broccoli I had chosen had "just stems." I said it wasn't a big deal and just walked away. It really wasn't a big deal to me, and I thought to myself I have bigger fish to fry than to worry about $1.39 broccoli.

Sis and I have been rewatching the latest series of Doctor Who, and The Doctor puts it exactly the way I feel; "the human race is never satisfied." Truer words have not been spoken. It seems like someone just has to complain about something. Or post or talk about the same stinking thing day after day on the same subject. It's just downright exhausting if I'm going to be honest. Yesterday I couldn't get those Peruvian people out of my head. They would simply love what we just carelessly complain about. It's challenged me to just be cognizant about my thoughts and ask myself if what I'm thinking or feeling is really worth getting so worked up over. Is broccoli being sold by the pound really worth getting worked up over? Is yet another "terrible two" worth, or spat with your family, or another "I hate my job", worth getting worked up about? In 2 days is it going to matter? Is it going to matter in a couple of hours, or a couple of years down the road? Chances are? Probably not. Hey, this is just for myself as it is for anyone who decides to read this. I'm just saying, I think we can all do a bit better in just being aware of our audiences and what's going on around us. There's enough negativity and drama in the world as it is.

Holly: The title of this post does seem a bit harsh, but it's only because Kelly and I are just as clueless as anyone else.  We have SO MUCH to learn from our brothers and sisters living in poverty, in third world countries, even those living next door to us.

Something I haven't been able to get out of my head is something that was said at church last week: We have absolutely no idea how to have relationships with people anymore, actual face-to-face, personal relationships without devices. I'm sure you know what I'm talking about: the couple at the restaurant or coffee shop, sitting across from each other completely absorbed in their phones. The individuals on social media who constantly post things like "My [spouse/significant other] is the BEST at everything, all the time, he/she is so awesome because he/she does this and this and this..." To the couple at the restaurant or coffee shop, put the phone down and realize what an amazing opportunity you have in front of you: the chance to share life with someone, the chance to spend time with someone you care about.  To the social media posters, I'm sure that your spouse/significant other is the BEST at everything all the time and is so awesome because he/she does this and this and this: Please tell them that, and tell them often.  We don't need to know that.  THEY do.

I actually sat down and wrote two letters last week.  Yes, actual pen-to-paper, catching up on life and sharing life with a friend I haven't seen in a while, and a friend that could be something more.  The people that Kelly interacted with in Peru have nothing, literally, nothing. But what they do have is each other, and that is so much more valuable than complaining on Facebook, or $1.39 broccoli. Kelly has been challenged to be more cognizant of her thoughts, and I'm taking the challenge as well. Because, chances are, we really do have it a lot better than we realize. 

House stuff, other stuff and what we've learned

Kelly: And once again, we apologize for the extremely large gap in between posts. Life has gotten somewhat in the way again, in good ways though. For starters, I'm getting ready to leave for Peru in a few weeks. Has it really been that long since an update? Yes! Anyway, I'm going to Peru in 2 weeks. A few folks from church, myself and a cohort in Georgia are getting together to do medical missions/children's ministry. We leave on the 1st and will be gone for 10 days. Wee bleep! So preparations for that have taken up a bit of my time, and there's still a few things I have to do but I foresee they will not be too terribly demanding.

As most of you all know, we are still in the process of getting ready to move into our first house...hopefully. Just for clarification, we are NOT buying. Still renting, but it's a nice house and for the price per month it's a pretty good deal. We looked at it last week, met our landlord and his wife, filled out our application and are now waiting. The wife was not too keen on the idea of us bringing along the fur babies, but we said leaving them behind was just not an option. She didn't come right out and say we couldn't have them, rather "preferably not." So now we're waiting and hopefully we will hear something soon. Throughout this entire process, it's been a series of just waiting. Waiting for answers, waiting for God's direction, waiting. And learning how to be patient and be ok with waiting. And learning and doing my best to maintain a positive attitude while getting things here packed up. Seems like some creepy-crawly bug freeloaders want to come along too, but I've had to give them a few smacks, sucks in the vacuum and a big firm no they are not allowed. That in and of itself is a whole other ordeal for another time. So yeah. Lots of waiting, but God has really shown us how to basically handle that, even though we feel like going crazy 99.9% of the time. It really does hold true that God doesn't give you patience; He gives you circumstances and scenarios in which you have no choice but to just be patient. And wait.

So there you have it. It's been exciting, knowing that something great is going to happen. Not knowing when it will happen has caused a bit of anxiety, but I keep telling myself it'll be worth it. Having a sense of humor throughout this process has helped greatly too, because if I wasn't laughing or trying to get sis to find the humor we'd probably be crying. Thanks for hanging with us, and we are looking forward to many many house parties!

Holly: And here I am, a couple of days late! I shared this entire process with the small house-based church we've been attending, and there was a comment that said "It's a good thing we're all so patient, right?" I WISH! Some days, I must admit, are much easier than others.  Some days it takes everything in me to not just take a flamethrower to the entire place and dance upon the ashes when it finally burns to the ground. But we can't do that (And we definitely shouldn't do that). Some days, most days, I just grin and bear it and deal with it, silently praying that one day, ONE DAY, we WILL hear something and we WILL be in a much better situation. Like Kelly said, though, God has shown us a lot through this waiting game.

I've been reminded one of the points from a sermon a couple of weeks ago, and I'm probably butchering it to kingdom come, but it was something to the degree of that you don't have to necessarily like your circumstances to keep trusting God. Do I like that we're basically sitting ducks? No, I don't.  I wanted to be out of our apartment months ago! But, unfortunately, life doesn't work that way. I'm just really fortunate that I have my faith in Jesus in the first place, because if I didn't have at least that hope, I really don't know what I would do. I'm also really fortunate that I have such a strong network of people that are cheering us along, encouraging us, also making us try to see the humor in it all, praying for us, offering to help us move, and so on.  It's good to have people! :)

So that's where we are right now.  Hopefully the next time we post it will be with a moving date and plenty of pictures and happiness galore! Thank you all for journeying along in this craziness with us!

The meatless results (and a house update?)

H and K: It has been seven days since our last post, and if you remember, we took it upon ourselves to go one week without meat.  So...how did we do?

Honestly, we didn't find it too challenging.  Some days, it was hard walking up Main Street and catching a whiff of the cafe's burgers, or resisting devouring an entire order of chicken wings from Papaleno's.  We did have one "cheat" day, Saturday, in which we attended a cook-out sponsored by Kelly's work.  We didn't go too crazy, though, in the sense that we both had just one chicken wing. Fried rice became a good friend of ours. Our weight didn't really change either, which we kind of expected, but that's ok, considering that wasn't the end goal.  We were just curious...and a little bit broke.  So will we do it again? Probably.  We had to get pretty creative with some of our recipes, but overall we enjoyed incorporating more veggies into our diet. The drastically reduced cost of groceries for the week was a good incentive, too!

And this concludes our one week without meat.  We learned a lot, had a good time...but honestly, if anyone would care to drop off a couple of steaks or a rotisserie chicken, that would be pretty amazing.

Switching gears a little, and we're just going full disclosure here, because we can do that here.  In case some of you are a little behind, we are in the process of moving, this time into a house.  We do have a house lined up, although we've only seen it from the outside.  However, here's where the situation gets a little hairy: The family that is living in the house now is waiting on a closing date for a house they're buying.  Once they get their closing date, they will move out, and we will move in. We are not buying, we're renting (Just in case that wasn't clear).  We do not know when this closing date will be.  It's been two weeks since we first made contact with our eventual landlord.  When I called him last week, hoping to affirm my fear of him not giving the house away to someone else, he informed me that they still had not reached a closing date, but that he still had our contact information and would reach out to us when they closed.  That was a week ago.  We still have not heard anything.

Honestly...it's been hard.  Our many frustrations with our current living situation, for reasons we don't wish to discuss at this time, have nearly reached a tipping point.  Let's just say it's gone on too long. Period.  In addition, it's just the waiting...the waiting and waiting for a phone call.  My (Holly) hopes soar every time my phone rings, and plummet when it's someone else besides the phone call we're anxiously waiting for.  It's the doubt...the doubt of wondering, nearly agonizing ourselves, if this is ever going to happen at all.  It's discouraging- another day that passes with silence, with no news. But through all of this, we've learned a lot about grace, and we are thankful for that. I (Holly) read Proverbs 3:5-6 recently, and I've been heavily meditating on that, relying on that promise in God's word.  We've been praying.  We've been praying a lot.  And still waiting.

So that's where we are right now.  If you feel led to pray for us, please do so.  And pray for the family that is waiting on a closing date; it's probably just as frustrating for them, if not more so, than it is for us. But we KNOW that something better is coming, and we KNOW that God is faithful.  It's just that some days are easier than others, and we thank God that He can handle our joys and our frustrations as well.  Thanks for following along with us, as always.  We hope to hear something soon.

Prayer for Casting Crowns

Holly: I'm writing on behalf of Kelly and I, because she is currently waiting out Snowpocalypse 2.0 up in Lexington, and I'm at home for snow day #3.  

My heart is a little bit heavy today.  I read on my Facebook and Twitter feeds this morning that the lead singer of one of our favorite bands, Casting Crowns, has been diagnosed with cancer. You can read the full story on their Facebook page.  

Kelly and I have been fans of their music for a long time.  Even before we rededicated our lives to Christ six years ago, I can still remember listening to them in high school.  When we were in youth group we saw them at ICHTHUS and I just remember feeling God's presence so strongly and thinking how anointed they were! We were also very fortunate to be able to see them in Lexington last February.  I'm pretty astounded that the story didn't end up on here, but again, God's presence was so strong there.  Honestly in my top five concerts I've ever attended!  I was moved to tears by "Who Am I" (Which, trust me, doesn't happen often).  Y'all...their music is something else.  If you have not listened to them, please do yourself a favor, and please join Kelly and I in praying for Mark.  He is able!  

I'll praise You in this storm
I will lift my hands
You are who You are, no matter where I am
Every tear I've cried, You hold in Your hands
You've never left my side, and though my heart is torn
I will praise You in this storm
I lift my eyes unto the hills, where does my help come from?
My helps comes from the Lord, the maker of heaven and earth. 

From last year.  Thrive.

Relentless love

Holly: The following is my Facebook status from this morning: 

Thought of a couple things on this rainy Wednesday morning:

1. Last night at choir, there was mention of a young man in Rockcastle County who attempted suicide.  Praise God he is still with us, but he is 15, and while he is physically healing, the spiritual and emotional damage is probably so much more extensive than we can even begin to imagine.  Granted, my life was not perfect at 15 (although better than most, I must admit), but I can not imagine wanting to take my life at that age.  At 15, you're still a kid; there's still so much more out there.  As I was praying in the car this morning, I prayed that we would be aware, that we would reach out, that we would show love, RELENTLESSLY, to others, because we never know what we are going through.  Sometimes it's one encouraging word, a smile, a silent prayer, that keeps someone from going over the edge.

2. I love the concept of a subtle witness: There is a shuttle driver that drives UK employees from the stadium to campus, and right as he pulls up and opens the doors, he ALWAYS says "Have a good day, and may the Lord bless you."  EVERY time.  It never fails to bring a smile to my face.  

Doing my best to think of others and to be that subtle witness, today, and every day.  :)

The first part, the young man, has been heavily on my heart since yesterday.  The word that kept running in my mind was "relentless".  We ought to NEVER stop showing love and compassion for one another.  Guys, it's still hard for me.  I know the words above probably disagree with that, but it's true.  The more I think of this, the more I realize that life isn't about me.  I was not put here on this earth for me.  I was put on this earth to love God and to love people.  I have hope, and every day I do my best to live out that hope.  I fail, I know I do, and I accept that, and I accept God's amazing grace and I try again tomorrow.  But I've said this before and I'll say it again- I sincerely desire to impact someone's life just by me being in it.   

For the life of me I simply cannot imagine getting to a point in life where you think the only way out is taking your own life.  I just can't imagine the pain, the loneliness, the fear, the despair that one must feel.  Especially with these young people; it just destroys me.  Feeling like there's absolutely no one and nothing...you're so, so alone.  I think at some point, we hit the lowest of valleys, but I have been blessed with an amazing support system, and I know that there are those who love me and support me and pray for me (And God knows I need it!).  But some people do not have that.  That destroys me too.  We weren't meant to do this life thing alone.  We're stronger together than we are apart.  I think it's high time we show people the human side of humanity, instead of all this nastiness and bitterness everyone is so hell-bent on broadcasting.  

Even darkness must pass.

Kelly: Where I work, I would say the most common report I get from patients is "I feel hopeless", "I've hit rock bottom" or "If (insert situation) doesn't get better, it will kill me." They feel like there's no hope. Some of these patients I've encountered don't have any family, or even a place to call home and no one to call friend. Some have all of the above and still feel hopeless, and that's when they come to us. Sadness, hopelessness, loneliness and fear, it doesn't discriminate. I've dealt with 18-year-old suicidal people and older suicidal people. My reaction is always the same; I hurt. I told a co worker on Monday that at one point or another I'm sure everyone has gone through some sort of depression in their life. I have. I KNOW I have. But never, not even for half a second did I ever even consider taking my own life. 

But some people have. Some people succeed and some don't. I remember this song from high school and some of the words are "how do you get that lonely? How do you hurt that bad?" That's why I do what I do; just try to love especially when someone doesn't feel loved. And the love that I share comes from Christ alone. That hope, joy and peace I have comes from Him too. I often wonder if my words of encouragement to others falls on deaf ears, but I'd like to think that what I say is what someone needed to hear at just the right time. I left early for work yesterday and a patient asked me to unlock his door. I jokingly said "you just want me to stay don't you?" He didn't say anything for a while, but he said "yeah, I do." It's the little things. 

Friends, I don't know what you all are going through. I'm sure some of you are going through the most unimaginable circumstances. I sincerely hope and pray that your situations, whatever they may be, will resolve soon. But when someone tells you they are thinking/praying for you, I hope it encourages you and lifts you up, even if it's for just a little bit. A sliver of hope goes a long way. 

In the wake of The Hobbit: Remembering Connecticut

Holly and Kelly: Our hearts are heavy this afternoon.  Despite the amazing motion picture event we witnessed last night/early this morning, we were hoping to be blogging about The Hobbit and providing a bit of a review.  But that is not the case.

We got home today and were shocked, saddened, by the news of yet another school shooting in Newtown, Connecticut.  26 people are dead, and at least 18 of them are children, all between the ages of 5-10.  There really are no words to describe this type of tragic loss.  It's simply deplorable and unimaginable.  Besides the words that we are typing today, we are simply speechless.

We're just saddened by this.  Literally, our hearts are hurting.  Why would somebody do something like this?

The President just finished speaking.  Today, I didn't see our country's leader.  I saw someone just like us: wondering how in the world someone can do this.  He spoke as a father.  

In the midst of all of this, it is imperative that we speak messages of love over hate, compassion over ignorance, tolerance over intolerance.  We need to pray for those who are hurting, those who are lost.  We need to be lights in this world that is growing increasingly dark.

If any of you reading this have children, hug them tonight, and hug them often.  Tell them you love them, and tell them often.  Be a friend.  Be a shoulder.  Be a light.  Our country simply cannot go on like this.  It just can't.

To speak lightly of The Hobbit, Bilbo sacrifices everything to join a company of dwarves.  Towards the end of the movie, Thorin asks Bilbo why he returned.  Bilbo notes that yes, they do doubt him, but he has a home.  He has a life that he often thinks of.  The dwarves don't have any of that.  But, in probably one of the most beautifully written scenes, Bilbo swears that he will help the dwarves reclaim their home.

Today, many people have lost everything.  We should all have a little bit of Bilbo in us; reaching out and helping to those in need.  We will be praying for those affected and we pray that any who read this will do the same.  <3

Change thinking to change feelings

Kelly: The last few weeks I have noticed a change in myself. And no, it's not just the 8 pound weight loss. This again is another change for the better. I have been happier. Much happier than I was this time last year. I remember thinking about this time last year; I was so on edge. About everything! The littlest things set me off and it was because I was just so...burned out, stressed out, worn out, worn down, and exhausted. Getting up at 4AM on Tuesdays was extremely draining and it was just go, go, go 24/7. No rest for the weary. And now? I'm not stressed (as much), I'm not tired, and I can't even remember the last time I had a genuinely bad day. What does that even mean anyway, to have a bad day? It's all relative. Anyway, but everyone keeps asking me what my secret is? How did I lose 8 pounds? Why am I so happy and cheerful?

It's GOD.

It was, it has been and it will be. Every morning when I wake up I consciously think in my mind "God, I'm here now. I want you to shine so brightly through me that people notice. I want to have a smile on my face and pass it on." Those thoughts vary daily, but for the most part I start my days with God just changing and transforming my mind. And let me tell you it is AMAZING how good I feel!!!! I smile more, I laugh more and I think positively more. This is also benefiting me because I have more time to PRAISE instead of PLEAD. Not that pleading to God is bad, but I can think of more times when I've said "Dear God, thank you for now" instead of "Dear God just get me through this!" There have been times when some troubles have come my way but I've learned (and am still learning) to just deal with them as they come. And I pray ALL the time "God have Your way in this situation." I don't ask to take it away because we might miss something if we just lock up all our stresses and worries in boxes and pray that they just disappear. I've  EMBRACED those challenges and saddled up the courage to face them. Finally. Now bear in mind, these changes I've made have taken many many months of pre-meditating, thinking and praying. But also these changes have come from inside me as well. I've had to pluck up courage from my strength (which comes from God) to just GO. To just go and live, because it is not God's will for me to live in bondage of all that holds me down. And here's something else; words are just words. Make a plan, pray about it, think about it, and follow through.

Holly: But God...

I am speaking from experience, as well as in concordance with Kelly, but every single word she says is true. This way of thinking has completely revolutionized my day-to-day ways of looking at things, situations, bad drivers, work issues, scary bills, crappy attitudes, cats that won't chill out, etc etc etc...But ever since I've taken the focus off of me and MY schedule, and MY current feelings, and all that I have to do for the day, and turning it into "Hey, God, um, thanks for EVERYTHING, I'm not sure what's going to happen today, but I totally trust You," things have just gotten better.  By all rights I should be having a conniption fit.  I don't have a job in two months, I have student loans to pay off, we're getting zero help from the college in terms of living expenses next semester...there's just a lot stacked against us.  I have hardly zero anxiety.  Seriously.  Because I rest and stand firm in the simple fact of all that God has brought us through, and I strongly believe He will not have brought us to Berea, to here right now, only to just be like, "Well, just kidding."  No.  That's not the God I serve and love.

The thing about faith, though, is that even though God has more than enough faith for you and me, sometimes we have to have faith in ourselves.  I've had lots of conversations with people about how stressed they are, how they're not sure they're going to make it, and they trust God, I can see that....but maybe it's themselves that they don't trust.  Let me tell you: there were plenty of times in my last semester of school where I wasn't sure if I was going to pass this one class.   I decided to shift my focus on GOODDD, saying, God, you've brought me through four years of school.  I'm giving this class to You!  I did that, but I also just kept telling myself, Holly, you're going to make it.  You are.  You have to!  You have so many people rooting for you!!

If you haven't been reading a word of this, please read this: YOU. ARE. NOT. ALONE.  Someone out there is rooting for you.  Someone has faith in you.  Please know this.  :)

My challenge is this: just try to shift your perspective, the way you think.  It takes time, believe me.  But it's worth it, I promise.  Let us know if you need encouragement, prayer, etc.

"You have to change the way you THINK in order to change the way you FEEL." -Robin Roberts

Praying for rain

Kelly: If you all have been watching 30 seconds of the news, it is story after story after story about the fact that rain has been needed. In more areas than ours, but still...rain has been needed. The first mini rain storm started on the first of this month; about 20 minutes of a good downpour. After that, nothing much. 90's, 100+ heat advisories for the last few weeks, and yeah. Before that I couldn't even remember the last time it rained. I'm fairly certain it did not rain the entire month of June unless somebody can jog my memory. Ok enough about that.

For the last few days it has rained a couple of times, but mostly just 20-30 minute downpours and the next day the grounds are completely dry again. This is due to the fact that even though the temperatures have been cooler the humidity is in the 80-90%. Well last night it stormed for quite a bit. Today we have gotten not only one, or 2 but 3 storms. The third one is en route as I type this. With RAIN!!!! Lots and lots of rain! As strange as it is there is a certain beauty behind these storms. It is an answer to prayers that many folks across the country have been yearning for. So yes. Very thankful. This recent rain storm has had me thinking about a silly analogy really. In life we go through "dry spells." A dry spell is defined in the book of Kelly as a moment or period of time in which extenuating circumstances get in the way and cause a wide variety of emotions. These emotions include but are not limited to doubt, fear, anger, worry, sadness, etc. In some of my friends I've noticed their dry spells have been with jobs, family, relationships or in my case health problems...or a health problem. I'm seeing a surgeon next Wednesday about my ankle. I don't know what the outcome will be. Maybe some rain (as in answers) will come my way.

Or maybe in my case it's a break from the storm I'm hoping for. Somebody who will listen and say "I hear you. Let's not cover the problem but try to figure out what's still causing it." So as I close, I will leave with this; take the time to figure out what your dry spells are, if you have any. Thank God for the rain He has sent, or maybe you still need prayers for rain to be sent.

Holly: Might I also remind everyone that like half of the country is in a drought.  Hopefully this rain now will help that.  Like Kelly, I can't even remember the last time it rained until tonight...I'm guessing April (20-30 minute bouts don't count...a WHOLE day of rain).  And I've also noticed many people I care about going through dry spells.  Perhaps the rain is a sign of better things to come.

Perhaps the rain is a sign of better things to come.  That's what I'm choosing to believe.  An old cliche I heard not too long ago is "I don't know what tomorrow holds, but I know who holds tomorrow."  Something I always joke around about life being short is that we just never know...I could step outside my door tomorrow and be hit by a bus.  We just don't know.  But what I do know is that many people have prayed for rain...and now it is here.  That has to count for something.  There's still hope.  There always is.

Just now Kelly was saying she always thinks of a particular song whenever it rains.  So I'll post some of the lyrics and also close with this:  we all go through dry spells.  But keep the faith that the rain will come.  As I said before, there's always hope.  It might not come when we want, or in a way that we expect.  But God has been way too good to me and my sister for not having hope.  The thunder and lightning are rolling...I believe things are changing.  Have faith.

"It doesn't have to make sense.  That's why it's called faith."  -from an episode of "ER"

Savior, Savior, hear my humble cry
While on others Thou art calling
Do not pass me by

Jobs and the First week as SENIORS!

Kelly: Bottom line, I love my job. Really. It is the best job that I have as a college student. The job? I work at the Learning Center, possibly changing to the Center for Transformative Learning. It's corny, I know, but I don't make the rules...I just follow them. Anyway, all I do is make coffee, schedule consultations for our student consultants (they help with a LOT of things, mostly papers), I help the newbies, load/unload the touchy dishwasher, and of course sit in to the occasional staff meeting. But today, I sang the "Mysterious Ticking Noise" song from PPP and glued candy wrappers to strips of paper! All the while laughing and having a fun time. Seriously, I LOVE my job, if I haven't said that enough already. I started last semester, so I had to today participate in this scavenger hunt for the new people. It was an hour of my life that I am never going to get back, but I had so much fun nonetheless.

This brings me to the second part of this blog. One official week of classes has occurred,  and I must say it has been quite a mighty stressful week thus far. Ok, so it's not really stress, just a lot of pressure on me. Basically, in order to further complete my nursing education, I have to pass a math competency test. In order to meet competency, a 23/25 on the test must be achieved in order to pass and be happy. First time I took the test on Monday, 19/25. Second time I took the test today, 21/25. The third and final time I am permitted to take this test will occur on Friday. So yes, it's on. If I pass this test, than yay me and I can get on with my life and repress and forget any memories of the horrific test. However, there is that slim possibility that I will NOT pass this test. This is putting me on edge a little bit...I really don't have a backup plan. In fact, I DON'T have a backup plan. Friends, readers and faithful followers, I've never really been in a situation like this before. If you pray, great. Please do. If not, send good vibes, bribe my professors, do voodoo, whatever you please (I am JOKING about the bribing!), but please think of me. I really hate being selfish, but I myself have been praying fervently and basically saying "God, if you're calling me in a different direction, show me a sign." I don't know if this is the sign or just the fact that He has something bigger and better for me come after Friday.

I will close with this, I am going to think positive. I am going to study for the 2 days that I have left before test #3 occurs. I am going to pray hard and thank God for getting me this far. I might cry, possibly, but we'll see about that. Thank you for reading this and thinking about us twins. Makes us happy that we have faithful followers (and they keep coming!!!!!!). Cheers!

Holly:  Yes, please pray/send happy vibes/perform ritualistic actions on behalf of...Kelly!  Seriously.  Do it.

Like my sis, I too love my job.  I started...about a week ago!  lol.  Haha...no, but really, what I am is a teaching assistant for my department (biology).  It is honestly the best job I have had in a long time.  And that ain't sayin' much, considering my first job EVER was my first job at Berea! (If you really want to know that particular post, feel free to ask me; I have plenty of stories). 

I could not have asked for better people to work with.  My fellow TAs are great and I absolutely ADORE the professors in my department! I use the term ADORE with all seriousness; my supervisor happens to be my academic adviser and he is just a wonderful person! And then some! Plus, I get the opportunity to meet a large portion of the freshman class, and (this is just based off of one lab section...part 2 is coming tomorrow morning, so stay tuned), but they are a great group of students: so eager, and they ask awesome questions! Which definitely makes my job a lot less stressful.  The opportunity to meet new students and further get to know professors/make THEIR lives less stressful is just awesome! I'm glad that I picked my final year of college to undertake this job! :)

Ok, now that I've gushed you all to boredom/oblivion about my job, I...really don't know what else to say.  Except biochemistry is HAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRDDDDDDDDD!!!!!

I just have to keep focusing on the "big one" ahead, which is walking across that stage in May!

Oh, and little random sidenote tangent thingamajig, but...Kelly and I have entered the ranks of independent cellular phone service/new cellular phones.  So far all is well.

blessings! :)