Things we learned in April

New friends: We've had the privilege of making one! It's never too old for anyone, isn't it? Over this past month we've done a few things together, and it was just a time in our lives where we felt God calling us to reach out to this particular person. It's been terrific!

Let's get better: We're both pretty healthy and have been for all our lives, but this month we decided to see for ourselves- that is, make actual, adult doctor's appointments and be more proactive with our health. I (Holly) go tomorrow, even though I'm currently battling cold-like symptoms, and Kelly went earlier in April and, aside from some joint issues, received a clean bill of health :)

Honest conversations and realizations: Sometimes you have to have them, be it for setting the record straight or coming to that conclusion that you just have to let go. It's one of the many ways we grow as humans.

Cars are expensive: Both of us had some unforeseen car issues arise this month that left us needing to pinch pennies for a few days. Be prepared!

Mental illness is real: Our sweet, dear friend bravely shared her struggles with depression in a candid, honest way, because so often these types of conversations are brushed aside. A sobering reminder to always, ALWAYS be kind and considerate to others, because we never really do know what the other is going through. Treat others with compassion, and be grateful for what you have.

Birthdays can still be fun: For the first time since either of us can remember, we rang in 26 out of school, out of home, and actually...out of Kentucky! We spent our birthday weekend in Chicago, where we nearly froze to death, ate way too much, and just cherished the moments we got to spend both together and with Justin.

Those that we hold in our hearts never truly leave us: Our beloved Grandpa passed away on our birthday (April 9) three years ago this year. It's almost every day that something or someone reminds us of him.

Happy b-day from Chicago! 

Introducing....Spout!

A spotlight on Christ. An outlet to plug in and share life. 

Holly and Kelly: Our church has a great youth program, starting as early as babies up to high school, in addition to an AWANA program that has garnered a huge amount of success. Our church also has a great variety of adult programs that meet throughout the week. We have Men's Sunday, Women's Sunday, Deacon Ordination Sunday and Youth Sunday. We have a Sunday School class for college students.

And that's it.

This is where we come in.

Starting in October, the two of us will be having a home-based small group for college students/young adults. The purpose is to have in-depth discussions based on Scripture and to fellowship with one another in other ways.  College is a crucial time, and while we want to have a Christ-centered focus, we also want to extend Christ's love and hospitality to those who choose to become a part of this group.  If a student wants to come over and hang out, has a question about a class or professor, is facing a faith challenge, or just needs a ride to Wal-Mart, we want to be there for them as much as possible during this time.  It is also a chance for us too, because we feel this responsibility, because let's face it, that's what it is, has been called upon us by God and we have decided to take the plunge and obey Christ. We have no idea what to expect, how many students will come, if any, and what sort of needs these students may have. But we're willing and ready to face whatever may come of it. We're excited, a little bit anxious, but have prayed and consoled with other Christians we trust and we feel this is a step in the right direction.

Maybe this is what following and obeying Christ is really about.

Now, a quick disclaimer: We are NOT, repeat, NOT leaving Berea Baptist.  We love our church and still value and cherish the relationships we have there.  We still love being in the choir and don't foresee that changing for a long time.  We have NO ill-will towards the church what. so. ever.  We simply see this need that the church possesses, and we feel that God has called us to try to meet that need.  We love the messages every week and are deeply encouraged and challenged. We can't predict the success of this upcoming endeavor- only God can.  And we're trusting Him to see this through.

So that's it. We appreciate your support in this decision we have made, and we are so thankful that it was at this church where we felt this need was started. The picture on the bottom is a tiny bloom, and we thought that was fitting. We want to help these young people grow, and in turn we will grow as well.

Deep breath: The next chapter

Holly: It's the deep breath before the plunge. -Gandalf, "Return of the King"

It's very fitting for me that the first episode of this newest season of Doctor Who is titled "Deep Breath." This, coupled with Gandalf's words and the words of those who have always had my back and will continue to do so, resonated with me as I hung up the phone this morning.

Today, another chapter in my life story began being written.

This morning I was offered an Americorps VISTA position, in conjunction with Berea College and an organization called Grow Appalachia.  I interviewed for this position on Tuesday, after taking the day off from work so I could gain my bearings and dwell on just what I could be getting myself into.  And today, I suppose that the Grow Appalachia team decided I can cut it.  And I know I can.  

I've had over a week to think about all of this, from the time I initially applied for the position until Tuesday, and even from after my interview on Tuesday until today.  If you know me, you know I've tried to get my foot in the door at the college for quite some time now, but every opportunity I applied for never even got an interview, just a solid rejection after months of waiting.  It was very frustrating, because I believed that God was calling me there.  But this opportunity was different.  Within an hour after submitting my application materials I was called for an interview (I'm really not exaggerating on that, either).  I had my interview on Tuesday and was told I would hear something within a week or two, the following Monday at the earliest; I got the offer today.  I know it doesn't make sense, but it just feels....right.  It's not going to come without some sacrifices, though; as a VISTA I'll be making roughly half of what I make now as a lab coordinator.  In addition to that, it's a 12-month commitment, meaning afterwards, there could be another open door with the organization, something at the college, etc...or I could be back at square one.  

But that's something I've learned while walking with God and living in this world we live in: You can't plan ahead if you're trying to follow God's will.  As a Christ-follower, I believe that God is sovereign, and He calls us to do various things, at any time, without warning, because He is God and He is in control.  As a Christ-follower, I do not live for myself; I live for God.  Where God goes, I follow in obedience and TRUST that He will provide for our needs.  Because He already has. And I'll let Kelly share that bit with you all.  

So that's where I am right now.  These next few weeks are going to be a bit of a whirlwind as I transition out of UK and all the comforts thereto and into the trenches of Americorps and service and really living like the least of these.  

Kelly: My thoughts will continue...after I eat dinner. 

Anyway, now that I'm finished, I will continue. I have to admit, I was a bit apprehensive at first, considering this will result in us having a drastic cut in our bank of income. And our Europe trip is now postponed until next fall, but these are sacrifices we were both willing to make. But to be fair, AmeriCorps is a really excellent organization, as is PeaceCorps, as a very dear friend is about 6 months into a 2 year commitment in Thailand. But as we were embarking on our almost daily evening walk, I found myself thinking about my last summer/year in college. I spent my last summer as a student working minimum wage as a facilities assistant...ok...I was a janitor, but hey, it was a good job. In my opinion its something everyone should do at least once in their lifetime. ANYWAY, but in my last year of school, I was working 15 hours a week making $5.65 an hour, and most of the time due to classes and clinicals, I wasn't even getting in 15 hours. I did the math, so that's...roughly $339 a month. And we were living off campus and had to pay rent, utilities, my own cell phone and the sort. Holly had just finished her first job at UK in November and soon after started working in Old Navy; that was her only job from December until I graduated. Then she got another job as a temp in UK's Department of Pathology. Between those two jobs, she was only making about $500 a month. Sometimes more if she picked up extra at Old Navy. Then, when I graduated, I didn't even have a job until August. So from the middle of May to the beginning of August, we were living only on Holly's earnings. And while I was in school, the two of us were living on less than $1000 a month. We were scared, to be honest. We struggled many times to make ends meet, but we got by. Thanks be to God I had food stamps. We prayed that God would meet our needs and bless us with what we had. And He did. Today He still continues to do so. 

So why am I telling you readers all of this? Number one, it's reality. It was reality for us for a long time. But it was possible; God brought us through that time. Number two, God is faithful! He is gracious to those who pursue His best interests. Holly wanted to find something in her field at the time, and I was following God's calling by finishing nursing school. However, that faithfulness doesn't come without a price; we had to learn that His answers come in His time, not ours. And even when we couldn't see the light, God was standing right there, even if He was just holding a flashlight. So that's that. Things will be tight, yes, but I remember God's promises and the fact that He brought us through that and so much more! We will make it work, rest assured, but we'll be ok. I prayed this morning that if this is meant to be, then it will be. God will make a way. Thanks to YOU ALL for being so supportive of us, and please continue your support. We will covet your prayers as this period will bring so much excitement but new challenges as well. 

Living life with no desire, not a flame but a fire.

Kelly: This morning, the two of us were presented with an opportunity to possibly fill a need in our church that several of us feel has not been met. For quite some time now, it's been under the assumption that this need has been "taken care of" and that others are doing something about it. In other words, there really isn't a clear direction. Anyway, more on that later, but that's what's been going on. What inspired this tidbit of possibly new direction was this morning at church. In today's day and age, we are all circling in our own orbits of day after day life, wondering how we're going to live for ourselves. Seriously, it's true. Even I myself am guilty of it. But how often do we think about those around us? I know that even in my line of work, when I walk out the door my mind is wondering of how I'm going to spend my next few days off.

It's no secret that we love helping people. I've dabbled into different volunteer opportunities for a while, but after a short amount of time found it wasn't my niche or the other volunteers were often gossiping about things not getting done or were sometimes judgmental towards those who came in. I witnessed this while at a food bank as a volunteer, and removed myself from there because it was a place I felt I did not or should not be mixed into. Hard to show the love of God when the majority are acting in ways that are the complete opposite of such. I have been praying for a while to find ways to use my time off in other ways other than myself; tired of being selfish let's just say. And then this opportunity came up. I don't know what kind of fruit this will produce; hopefully good but again, all in God's will and in His perfect plan. The title of today's post is derived from the words of a song by Matthew West titled "Do Something." Listen to it if you want a good encouraging message and a reminder of our duty as Christians. It's up to us; nobody else is going to take care of it. If not us then who? If not now then when?

Holly: I read a status on Facebook a while back from a young mother, claiming that she hated every single thing about being a parent, yet she loved her child (I really wish I was making this up).  Part of this rationale was that this person believed that we as humans were entitled to being selfish.  I could not disagree with this more.

I might get some flack for this statement, but I believe it to be true, completely regardless of whether or not you are a Christian: Life is not about you.  There.  I said it.  I think, as a Christian, or even as a decent human being, we ought to be seeking out ways to serve others, instead of attempting to fulfill our own desires.  Guys, I am far from a pristine example of this.  I still am learning, but it is only by the grace of God that I can keep trying.  Something that struck me especially from the sermon today (which we've heard before) is that we waste so much time on trivial, meaningless things.  We compartmentalize ourselves, turn ourselves into islands with our Netflix and our iPhones and we just completely miss the point.  Again, Guilty.  As.  Charged.  Things are just that....things.  Things don't last.  Period.  One of my favorite passages of Scripture comes from 2 Corinthians 4: "So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal."

As Kelly mentioned, we have an opportunity at our feet that, right now, we aren't sure of much.  It's still in the planning stages, but we are praying for God's will and direction, confirmation that this is what He wants to do.  He knows our hearts and our desires.  At least for me, one of the goals is that we will reach out to those in need, that we will open our homes and our hearts, and that we will bring them to Jesus.  That's the main goal: Jesus.  Because I still think life isn't about us.

If not us, then who?
If not me and you right now, it's time for us to do something!
If not now, then when?
Will we see an end to all this pain?
It's not enough to do nothing.  It's time for us to do something!
We are the salt of the earth, we are a city on a hill
We're never going to change the world by standing still

30 Days of Writing: Five Ways to Win Your Heart

Holly: I was inspired by a friend...well, two friends actually, who both have amazing writing talent.  For a time Kelly and I used to write.  When I was in England I took a writing class.  Maybe something will happen from this.  But for now, I think we're just going to kind of roll with it and see where it goes! :)

Day 1: Five ways to win your heart

1. Love Jesus.  Pretty self-explanatory.  But Jesus set the bar for love and life, essentially.  The way I see it is you can't fully love someone unless you realize the perfect love that only Christ can give.
2. Have a sense of humor.  Life is too short to take anything seriously.  Laugh at things.  Laugh at yourself.
3. Be genuine.  I know this is so cliche, but it's so hard to find these days, especially with such a superficial society.  Being yourself gets people a lot farther than they realize.
4. Have goals, even if they're small.  Everyone needs something to work for.
5. Don't be afraid to let people know you're with me.  Hold my hand.  Hug me for just a second longer.  Kiss me in public.  Don't be shy.  Love is nothing to be ashamed of.  Oh, and like hobbits too.  :)

Kelly:

1. Love Jesus before myself. If you love me you have to love Him first too.
2. Love Lord of the Rings. I really don't need to go into any more detail.
3. Be true to yourself and be true to me. I have a heart for honest people; people who are honest about themselves and TO themselves. This goes for me too; be honest with me. Always. I can't tell a lie to save my life, so don't do the same to me.
4. Love other people. It's my duty as a Christian, human being and future RN.
5. Invest. Do the little things more than what's expected. Don't go to bed angry with me. Kiss me good morning every morning. Smile, especially when I'm sad. I will give 110% to whoever God calls me to be with; I expect 110% out of the relationship too.

What's your appleseed?

Kelly: There is a reason for the crazy title that will be explained in a little bit. Anyway, the topic for this blog today is regarding fear. What in the world are we so afraid of? I could rattle off a few things, such as snakes, falling off really high places, and stinging bugs. Yeah. But if there was something that REALLY got me bone-chilling afraid...it'd be this.

Pain. Never knowing again what not having pain feels like. Yes, I am talking about my ankle...again. Now before you automatically disregard this, please don't. I've been thinking about how to describe what I'm so afraid of for a while, but after today at church I finally understand. I am afraid that I will never be pain-free again. It's not a phobia, but yeah. It does scare me. I have felt on numerous occasions that I will be the way I am for the rest of my life. And I haven't accepted that yet...because I'm afraid to. See where all the fear is coming from? But today, I've thought of something different. Something in a way that I haven't heard before.

Hope.

There is. There always is. And God...my God...is so much bigger than your fears. Than my fears. Than all my pain and worry about never knowing no pain. And that gives me hope. That is what has fueled me in all the areas in my life; that hope that God is so much bigger than all my junk that He has erased and freed me from! It is not His will for us to live in fear; to live in bondage of this and that and then some. But...it's a choice. I am trusting Him, or at least learning to trust Him more. It hasn't been easy. Some days it's easy to trust God; some days, most days, it's really hard. But I make a choice. Daily. So now I ask this; what are you afraid of? What are you doing about it? Are you ok with living in fear or is today the day you're going to decide that you don't have to? That it's not your will to do so? Yes. I'm still in pain. But God is bigger than pain.

Holly: The title comes from the sermon today: our pastor mistaking a bed bug in his 2-year-old daughter's bedroom for a mere appleseed (the story is much more humorous than I'm letting on).  But what I'm getting at is this: why do we WORRY???????????? All. The. Time?          qwvgbsegbf (attack of the Yoda...sorry)

We get so bent out of shape with worry and fear that it distorts reality...we see things that simply are not there.  We get crazy ideas planted in our head, we have visions of crazy things that could, should, might happen.  And then what happens, 9 times out of 10, is that we worry over absolutely NOTHING.  Kelly used to get herself physically sick over worrying; kid you not.

The challenge from today was what if Christians, PEOPLE, lived in simple faith and not fear?  That doesn't mean that us as Christians are going to have hard times and struggle.  But the difference is that we can choose to trust in the One who knows all, sees all, created all, and dealt with it all whenever we have a hard time.  Whenever we feel that age-old fear creeping up again.  It's a choice, like Kelly said.  We can either choose to continue to let fear cripple us to the point of distorting reality, or we can do something about it.  If you know that something in your life is causing you worry, pray about it.  TRUST that God will see you through it, and REFLECT on all the things that God has already carried you through, and then IMAGINE all the things that God is going to carry you through in the future!!!!

How's that for making an appleseed into an apple tree?

In ________ we trust?

Holly: Trust is one of those words that gets thrown around a lot.  What does it mean to "completely" trust someone?  Are we too trusting, and what does that make of us?

To say that I had trust issues as a teen is a pretty fair statement.  I mean, they weren't to the point that I couldn't even function in society, but more often than not I found myself wondering to myself about the hidden agendas of other people.  I suppose that being bullied was a contribution to that.  There were also some family issues going on that I'd rather not disclose.  Even as a kid though, I was very shy (believe it or not).  At times I was even called "too trusting" of other people, which, back then, was frowned upon.  Insert the terms "naive" or "gullible" here...

So where do I stand today?  I have to admit that I'm a little too cautious for my own good.  I always lock my car at work (and I work in the middle of nowhere) and we always make sure the apartment doors are locked (even when we're all home).  As Kevin said this morning in his sermon, we have become a society of suspicion...we are ALWAYS suspicious of what's going on around us.  I have warmed up around people now, much more so than when I was younger, but I am always exercising caution in unfamiliar places.

To play the faith and follower in Christ card, lately I've been struggling with trusting God too.  I suppose that being on your own and losing any and all forms of security (i.e. a regular, stable income, convenient food, and a place to live that you don't have to pay for) post-graduation from college will do that to you.  Just the other day I made another phone call to home asking for money.  I HATE worrying about money.  I really do.  That night I went to bed and wondered in my mind to God how we were going to make it through to our next pay day.  Yesterday I received the card from home and inside it was WAY more $$ than what I had asked for!  I asked God for a handful and He gave me an armful!

When will I learn to trust?  I'm still learning.  But today's sermon was a great reminder of such: I must trust God.  I have been praised in the past for always being strong in my faith and I intend to continue down that path.  It hasn't been easy.  But God is still proving faithful.  TRUST.

Kelly: Again I walked away deeply challenged. Like I posted on my facebook, I don't know what it has been about these past few weeks. Not that I'm saying the sermons in the past have been bad by any means...but these past few have been ESPECIALLY good!! Like Holly said, I used to have trust issues with people. Especially people who hurt me. Every now and then something strikes in me where I am caught thinking about "what if I did this/say that?" I never held grudges, but secretly distrusting others was in a way doing just that.

As it was said in church, you can't trust everybody. It's a sad truth. I remember growing up not even locking our house or the cars; we lived out in the middle of nowhere. It was something we never had to worry about. Then our house got broken into. Ever since then all the doors and windows locked, all the cars locked. And we live out in the middle of nowhere. I would be lying if I didn't say that when we were at home alone, I would watch an on-going car to make sure it didn't stop in the road. Much truth was said at church; our society trains us to be suspicious. Can't trust anybody.

Having said that, there are those I can always trust, no matter what. I will now use an example from Lord of the Rings. Yes, we recently became fans; I don't want to hear it!!!! We lived in the middle of nowhere! There was a scene in which Sam and Frodo were on their way to Mordor to destroy the ring, and they were led by Gullum...a hobbit-like creature. The ring, which he referred to as "The Precious," caused him to have a split personality and caused him to become a very disturbed individual. Smeagol, his friendlier personality, would often fight with Gullum. Anyway, because of a minor twisting of the truth, Frodo eventually left Sam and continued on with Gullum/Smeagol. However, Frodo eventually discovered Sam was right; Gullum wanted the ring for himself. It just amazed me how much the truth can be twisted by only a few words. And people believe it...ALL THE TIME. So it leaves with the question; who can we trust? I know my answer. Sometimes I don't always behave in a way that is pleasing to God, but I do my best. It's not easy. Just worth it.

In the meantime, what shall we do? What can we do about overcoming a distrusting world? The answer is simple; know yourself. Other than God, you know yourself better than anybody. Ask yourself; is this REALLY true? If you don't know, ask the source. It's better to put out the flames than continue to fuel them. Holly and I were talking about this last night. Second, find someone you can trust. If it isn't God, then I pray you will/do have someone you can trust. I will leave with this. Also, LOVE. In a song I know, one of the lines is "You can never love too strong." I find this to be very much true. If you can love others, then they will love you in return. If they love you, they can trust you. But you have to love and trust yourself too.


"Love always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres."  1 Corinthians 13:7