30 Days of Writing: Your Fears

Kelly: The kind of world/society generations younger than me will have to endure and go through.

Being stagnant in my relationship with God.

Finding a job, not liking it but staying with it to make money, end up miserable and "stuck" in such job.

The thought of Yoda/Wiley accidentally getting out and not coming back. :(

Holly: Stagnancy in general

That I won't find a job in my field

When I come to the end of my Earthly life, that even though I did my best, that God will be disappointed in me

The kind of world/society my kids/grandkids will have to see

The kind of world/society that we already see

People being disappointed in me

Being stranded in downtown Lexington (don't judge me on this one...have you been to downtown Lexington??)

Falling

What's your appleseed?

Kelly: There is a reason for the crazy title that will be explained in a little bit. Anyway, the topic for this blog today is regarding fear. What in the world are we so afraid of? I could rattle off a few things, such as snakes, falling off really high places, and stinging bugs. Yeah. But if there was something that REALLY got me bone-chilling afraid...it'd be this.

Pain. Never knowing again what not having pain feels like. Yes, I am talking about my ankle...again. Now before you automatically disregard this, please don't. I've been thinking about how to describe what I'm so afraid of for a while, but after today at church I finally understand. I am afraid that I will never be pain-free again. It's not a phobia, but yeah. It does scare me. I have felt on numerous occasions that I will be the way I am for the rest of my life. And I haven't accepted that yet...because I'm afraid to. See where all the fear is coming from? But today, I've thought of something different. Something in a way that I haven't heard before.

Hope.

There is. There always is. And God...my God...is so much bigger than your fears. Than my fears. Than all my pain and worry about never knowing no pain. And that gives me hope. That is what has fueled me in all the areas in my life; that hope that God is so much bigger than all my junk that He has erased and freed me from! It is not His will for us to live in fear; to live in bondage of this and that and then some. But...it's a choice. I am trusting Him, or at least learning to trust Him more. It hasn't been easy. Some days it's easy to trust God; some days, most days, it's really hard. But I make a choice. Daily. So now I ask this; what are you afraid of? What are you doing about it? Are you ok with living in fear or is today the day you're going to decide that you don't have to? That it's not your will to do so? Yes. I'm still in pain. But God is bigger than pain.

Holly: The title comes from the sermon today: our pastor mistaking a bed bug in his 2-year-old daughter's bedroom for a mere appleseed (the story is much more humorous than I'm letting on).  But what I'm getting at is this: why do we WORRY???????????? All. The. Time?          qwvgbsegbf (attack of the Yoda...sorry)

We get so bent out of shape with worry and fear that it distorts reality...we see things that simply are not there.  We get crazy ideas planted in our head, we have visions of crazy things that could, should, might happen.  And then what happens, 9 times out of 10, is that we worry over absolutely NOTHING.  Kelly used to get herself physically sick over worrying; kid you not.

The challenge from today was what if Christians, PEOPLE, lived in simple faith and not fear?  That doesn't mean that us as Christians are going to have hard times and struggle.  But the difference is that we can choose to trust in the One who knows all, sees all, created all, and dealt with it all whenever we have a hard time.  Whenever we feel that age-old fear creeping up again.  It's a choice, like Kelly said.  We can either choose to continue to let fear cripple us to the point of distorting reality, or we can do something about it.  If you know that something in your life is causing you worry, pray about it.  TRUST that God will see you through it, and REFLECT on all the things that God has already carried you through, and then IMAGINE all the things that God is going to carry you through in the future!!!!

How's that for making an appleseed into an apple tree?

VICTORY!!!

Old picture from last year. Love it because it fits today's theme :] 

Kelly: "But the hard times will come. And we'll keep moving on. We're moving up.
Life, hope, trust, faith, pride, love lust, Keep moving on. 
Laugh, cry, live, die. 
Make the best with what you're given. This ain't dyin; this is livin." -Good Charlotte, "Moving On."

I serve a mighty God! I really do. Everyday of my life I do not deserve His love, mercy and grace. Earlier this week, I think in the previous blog post, I mentioned a big test that I HAD to pass in order to continue on with my nursing education. I won't go into the gorry details, because you can just read the previous post in order to know what the criteria and stipulations were. Took it the first time on Monday, missed 6. Took it the second time on Wednesday, missed 4.

This brought me to last night. I went to bed at 11:30, but didn't fall asleep till about an hour later. I sat awake, thinking and praying about the future, because I honestly did not know what I was going to do. After listening to Michael W. Smiths "This is Your Time" and saying a final prayer, I finally went to sleep. The pressure was on; I even had a conversation with Holly earlier and was trying to talk myself out of everything. I had made plans and done research on other alternatives for a new major. Got up this morning and had a lonnnnnng conversation with God again. I asked Him to remove my fears, doubts, worries, insecurities and all the bad thoughts, because all that can be left are good and positive ones. I sat down with the test in front of me and just said to myself "I know what I'm doing. I am capable."

Give or take 45 minutes later, and I finished. Pacing and pacing, found a friend of mine, gave her a hug, hopped around a bit, then..."Kelly." Then, "you missed 3. Fix one, and you'll pass." CRAP!!!!!!! Sitting back down in the chair, I furiously searched for the 3 I missed. Luckily, they were the easier questions, which means i DO know what I'm doing. The question: "Toparol given 150 mg ER daily." Hmmm...I thought...ER can mean two things. Enteric Route, which was what I had, but what else could it mean? What else does it mean? Think, dummy think. Then...EXTENDED RELEASE. I wrote it in all caps and turned it back in. And that was it. I was gone, realizing after I left the building I left my cup of coffee on the table. Oops.

Ran, well, walked rapidly to the Science Building, met up with Holly and her roomie, danced in the hallway, ran outside, danced outside, turned a cartwheel on the Fairchild lawn, hopped around some more. Holly's roomie bought me a soda from Berea Coffee and Tea (BC&T for the new readers that may come along). So it's official; I am competent in Nursing math and am MOVING ON with the program! Granted I still have to turn in my extension to stay longer and finish such degree, but I can do this! I CAN DO IT.

"What a mighty God we serve.
What a mighty God we serve. 
Angels bow before Him
Heaven and Earth adore Him
What a mighty God we serve."

Holly: Don't have much to contribute to this, except I will elaborate on the celabratory happy dance that partook after my class this morning.  It definitely turned some heads!!!! XD

But, nevertheless, a major obstacle has been conquered in the Korb realm and life is resuming on a happy scale for today! God is good, better than we can comprehend!  I hope that some of you readers can get a taste of the indescribable joy that we feel! :)

blessings!